Stories of Feast?

Tip20.com is probably one of my favorite sites when it comes to hearing people bitch about their bad work environments. They have a forum on there where people can talk about their bad experiences or their good experiences. Stories of Famine are obviously the bad ones, and Stories of Feast are the good ones. The last two shifts have been of feast. I can't complain about any of it. Maybe it's because my co-workers have been reading through these entries, or maybe it's just my server karma finally catching up. (I did shell out over 80 bux in tips in the past 2 weeks, so I would hope so!) Either way, things have been looking up. The summer is coming which of course means all of the kids, but also the busy lunches with graduations and summer birthdays. Only time will tell if the summer will be as much of a success as the last two have been in my restaurant. We shall see...

In Appreciation of my Co-Workers and Managers

Originally this post was going to be called "Bartenders are human too" as a thank you to a bartender at work who found my blog's name humorous. In all honesty, every single job in the restaurant business sucks. No matter how much you are being paid, you are still dealing with high stress and drama. Sure, people will say "you have that at every job" but they do not know what it is like until they've waited tables or have at least worked in food service.

Here I am going to break down the crucial parts of our restaurant.

Hosts: They deal with the people from the second they enter the door. The host can either make or break the guest's mood. The host's job is to seat the guest(s), talk to them along the way, and let them know any specials of the day/week/month. It may seem easy, but it is extremely stressful when you're in an hour and a half wait and have the same four people coming up every five minutes asking if you skipped their name. How about the people that come fifteen minutes after you called their name and then complain that they didn't hear it? The poor hosts also deal with the crowded waiting area and the fact that they aren't even able to sneak in a bite or a drink for hours at a time while trying to keep the waiting masses calm.

Servers: The servers take a majority of the impact of the restaurant. The server does literally everything for the guest. They are responsible for making that person's experience an enjoyable one. I could go on and on here, but there are plenty of other posts in regards to servers, so I'll spare you.

Bartenders: The bartenders in chain restaurants are responsible for making 95-100% of the non-fountain drinks. Bartenders are often unappreciated in chain restaurants. They do make the most money sometimes, but often have a lot of prep work and closing side work to do that most non-chain bars do. Bartenders have to take care of their own guests while also managing the service bar (tickets that servers ring in for their tables) and sometimes takeout. While this might not sound like a lot of work, imagine having 20-30 bar guests who need refills, 5 tickets of frozen drinks, 3 takeout pickups, and a whole list of people you have to call back to make sure their takeout order was good.

Cooks/Prep/Dishwashers: Another extremely unappreciated job! These are the people who make the restaurant function in the way it does. If the dishwasher stops washing dishes and silverware, your guests don't have plates or silverware. The cooks can also make or break a table. If they don't read the screen or tickets, sometimes things will come out wrong. Cooks are human too! We all make mistakes! It's normal to make a mistake here or there. I consider the ticket/expediter's screen system similar to highway hypnosis. Almost everything on that screen is a repeat of something you've done earlier, so while it is important to pay attention to details, it is natural to sometimes miss the slightest of details. Your cooks make sure your hungry guests are fed, and therefore make sure there is money being placed in your pockets.

Expediters: Expo's are a crucial part of the kitchen. Expo's control how the food is being presented when it leaves the line. The expo is yet another unappreciated job when it comes to food coming out wrong. It is the servers job to ring the order in correctly. It is the expo's job to make sure it comes out as it was rung in on the ticket, correcting the chefs on occasion, or letting a manager know of any potential problems. Once again, expo's are crucial, and like servers, they sometimes forget that you told them a modification after ringing in the food wrong!

Managers: Manager's are extremely underappreciated! They deal with every problem you can think of that nobody else on the staff wants to touch. Angry guests, angry employees, hiring people, terminating people, calling cabs, potentially harmful guests, food allergies, paperwork, ordering supplies, maintenance, inventory, you name it, they deal with it. Sure, the managers have the power, but how do you think they got there? They started in one of the jobs stated above and worked their way up whether it was through hard work or not. They still deal with the worst of the worst situations and often take over when any of the people above can no longer handle the situation.

So in appreciation, this is for all of my co-workers and managers for making my job easier than it could be.

I love old ladies...okay I'm lying...

Yesterday was almost like an amusement park ride on the verge of breaking down. Our restaurant was surprisingly very busy for the first time in weeks on a lunch shift. Of course, being that it's graduation time, families are bringing their graduate out for a nice free dessert and a birthday turned into graduation song.

My day started off with the kisses of death themselves. I had just dropped a check on a table and went to greet my new table. Usually when you greet a table, you take a drink and appetizer/soup order. These were the slow answering type who didn't quite know what they wanted. I tried to take just the drink order, but they wouldn't let me leave. I had to sit there and read through the menu with the mother/wife of this family because apparently nobody else at this table knew how to read, not even the graduation boy. The table who I just left the check for needed change of $100 so I had to actually get another server to break the change for me at the bar while this family asked me what came with what and how much everything was even though the prices were in front of their face.

This family ordered steaks for the parents, shrimp in a basket, and a cheeseburger for the kids. I repeated the order back not one, but three times in order to verify what they were ordering was what they really wanted. Sometimes you have to do things like that when someone asks how many ounces each steak are, and how many shrimp come in a basket, if fries are extra on a burger platter, etc. Anyhow, I had three other tables to take care of, so I got their order in and went about my business. These kind of folks are priceless. They consist of kids who don't know how to read the menu themselves, parents who order for their teenagers, and then the wife who orders for the husband and the really sweet and nice husband who can't thank you enough. This wicked witch of a wife called me over to the table every single time I stepped foot into my section. Actually, she didn't call me, she waved her hand and snapped her fingers. After their food had come out, she says to me "I asked for no mushrooms on this steak." So i replied back, no you didn't, I repeated the order three times. You had four chances to tell me that you didn't want mushrooms." In actuality, she probably didn't even read the menu or know what she was ordering. She ordered the largest steak with shrimp combo that we had and had the steak cooked well done. She also complained about the size of the steak. After that incident she snapped her fingers and waved her hands again like she was hailing a cab. I asked her if I could do anything for her and she asked for the side of shrimp she ordered with one of her kids cheeseburger. I told her again that she didn't order a side of shrimp, just a shrimp basket. Her kid looked at me like he had no idea what was going on. I am not a mind reader, so I asked her if she'd like me to ring in a side of shrimp. She said no, so I left again to do sidework and run food. When I was greeting another table, she was waving like she was having a seizure, so I asked my other table to hang on for a minute. She then asked me to ring in the shrimp. I rang them in but when they came out there were literally six to eight shrimps. She complained about the price so I got my manager to greet the table. Then they were fine and dandy...or so I thought.

When I dropped the check, the lady handed me $5. The bill was already at $58. She then asks me to ring in a shrimp basket dinner to go. I gave her a new bill which came out to $68. She paid with a credit card and left nothing extra.

To top that incident off, I got sat with 5 old ladies who complained about the size of the booth. Unfortunately we were on a wait so I couldn't shift them to the other side of the restaurant. They ordered 5 waters with lemons, a pitcher of water with lemons, and 5 bacon cheeseburgers with sauteed onions. Sauteed onions are an upcharge of a measly 75 cents. When I came back with the 5 waters with lemons, one of the ladies says to me "No! I want my cup filled with this much ice and this much water!" So I came back with a glass filled to the top with ice and probably a few ounces of water. I also brought them the pitcher of water which they were very thankful for.

When their food came out they were in heaven. They were chowing down on those burgers like you've never seen someone eat. I swore they were going to eat the wax paper and the burger plate. I asked them how everything was and they said "Absolutely delicious" "Wonderful" "Thank you so much" and other kind words. When I dropped the check, that was another story.

Their bill couldn't have been more than $43. They complained about the $3.75 total upcharge for the sauteed onions on the burger. Then I heard comments like "Those onions weren't even cooked!" "They weren't very good" and other sob stories. My manager didn't want to deal with them, so he comped off the onions. Their bill was now under $40. They did tip me okay, but it was quite the pain ringing in 5 burgers with onions that had to be well cooked and melted under the cheese. After they left I went in the garbage area and saw that those onions were in fact cooked and melted in. Anything to save a buck.

Oh those waters with lemons!

Summer's here! Yes, you know what that means...More and more teenage girls ordering a water...with a lemon or a plate of lemons! Why on earth is that little piece of lemon so important? Someone please explain this? I still have yet to figure it out because I'll be damned if that little sliver of lemon brings a soda-like flavor to the water without the calories, sugar, and carbohydrates.

I decided to run a test on how many people would ask me for that little lemon after I brought out a water without one. Usually when someone orders a water, you are to assume they want it with a lemon unless they say "no lemon." Well, I reversed it and if they order a water, they get a water with no lemon. On several nights last week I had people say "oh can I get a piece of lemon?" or "can I get a plate of lemons?" Sure, I only made it harder on myself, but this is not something that these people do at home. This is something they've learned while dining. It is quite possibly one of the most annoying little quirks of working in dining. Sure, we're here to please guests, but if you want that lemon in your water, say so while ordering. Also, learn your servers name that way I can tell them to get their own tables a water with a lemon refill while I am running their food. We tell you our name for a reason.

The outdoor cesspool

The patio lately has been an overflowing trash can of people with no common sense or courtesy. Today I opened which consisted of bring out all of the tables, unstacking those pesky plastic chairs, and then setting them at the tables. It was raining all morning but our company still makes us set up the patio in case of a sudden disappearance of rain clouds. Ironically enough, this is what happened today. While me and my patio partner were pretty set on getting sent home, those two brave people said "we want to sit outside." Mind you, it was also over 95 degrees out. I could feel the swamp ass already. Like the domino effect, every table was soon occupied.

My first table were a party of five, two adults and three kids. They started their afternoon off with some alcoholic beverages, an appetizer, adult sized soft drinks for the kids, and four steak entrees with a double kid meal. Almost immediately after greeting and taking their drink order down, out came the sun. The next question out of their mouth was "can we get an umbrella?" Of course, I have to say yes, so I make my way to the back of the restaurant by the dumpsters to grab an umbrella, just as I am sat with two guys from the offices around the complex. One of them is a parapalegic of some sort. They order a lemonade, an unsweetened iced tea, then also ask for an umbrella, and a dish towel to lay on the guy in the wheelchair's lap. I get the umbrella, their drinks, and went back into the restaurant to get the dish towel. In our restaurant, finding a towel is like finding gold. The guys on the line have access to all of the clean towels they could want, but god forbid a server wants one. We have to go through the process of having a manager open up the closet room to get one. When I came back out, the guy's snooping friend was going through our patio shed looking for a dish towel. I had one in hand. I felt pretty violated that they didn't trust that I was in fact getting them one, and had I had one outside, I wouldn't have taken so long to get one. After that, they order soups in 95 degree weather. I love making soups. So after their soups are out my other table asks me for another drink, which comes out with a hair in it. Comp! So I have to get the bar to remake it, and then they ask for refills for their kids. I get 3 more soft drinks, and when I come back they ask for 5 waters. I get the 5 waters and my other table's food still isn't out. The 2 guys asked me to have their food to-go which results in my managers spazzing out on me. I finally get their food bagged up, and then the other table asks me for one more refill on a soft drink. They then ask me for the check. Needless to say their tip was just around 12%, but I was totally disheartened when I realized that not a single one of them had even touched the waters I brought out. Why ask for something you aren't even going to use?

The rest of my tables were relatively easy going, but our rush died at 1pm. It lasted almost an hour, but that hour was just nonstop crash in every aspect of our restaurant. I helped my patio partner clean up all of their tables and then sent them home. I walked with under $40.

Server Karma

So you want to know what kind of tipper I am? I believe in generous tipping. I will never leave a tip under $6, no matter how low the bill is. I believe in at least a 25% tip on any check over $30.

A few weeks ago I went to a local diner with a friend of mine for a quick bite. Our tab couldn't have been more than $30. Our waitress (who I left a servers are human too card for) was awesome. She is probably my favorite waitress at this diner just because of how attentive and friendly she is. Anyhow, a table full of rowdy guys sat across from us. They even went as far as asking me what I was eating. They were probably drunk or just flat out rude because they were hassling the waitress for no reason. They ate maybe half of their food. I'm not even sure if they left her a tip on the table. Luckily this was a pay at the register diner. If this was my restaurant they probably would have been a walkout. Anyhow, after their disgusting mess was left behind on the table, our waitress came back to us to make sure everything was okay. While we knew that these guys just walked her like a dog, she didn't let it affect how she was treating us. We dropped a $13 tip, wishing we could afford to drop more. I hope that made her night.

Last week I went to another restaurant in my chain with several friends. Our bill was around $70 after I had my employee discount taken off. We left her a $25 tip. Our server was attentive, polite, and was able to spend a lot of time talking to us as she had no other tables. It was a really pleasant experience and I would definately go back and ask for her to be my server.

Last week I also went out for Sushi at a fairly high volume place. In some sushi restaurants, there is relatively no tipout, so a 15% tip is usually appreciated. That's not good enough for me. Our bill came out to $32, we left at least an $8 tip.

Father's day...Need I say more?

At our restaurant, it is almost expected to be very busy on the holidays. In fact, our restaurant on a weeknight used to be packed like the holidays at my old restaurant, but something has gone wrong. Our restaurant has lost its spark.

If there's one thing I hate, it's serving on days like Mother's day and Father's day. For as long as I can remember, I've always had to work these two Hallmark holidays while leaving my parents an IOU on the table.

My night started off with an extremely steady rotation of tables. I had a lot of $20 tips on bills $100 and lower. Even the highest bill of $115 landed me a $20 tip. By 7PM I realized I had hit close to $200 in tips before tipout. I just had to maintain the 15-20% tips to keep a good portion of this money.

At $1700 in sales, I walked with $217 after tipping out $20 to the food runner who well deserved the money. I did fairly well for what is usually considered a trash type of day at work.

Now for the people who really stood out...(did you really think I would have nothing to complain about?)

After my crashing for two hours last week over one table of old people, they once again came back and graced my section inside the restaurant. These folks ordered the same drinks as last week but also added in one of the new promo drinks. They order everything with house liquor which is garbage and tastes like pure rubbing alcohol, but that's their problem, not mine. They make a point of it to only give them house liquor because they don't want to pay for good liquor. I greeted them, and was only recognized by half of the table. The old Cryptkeeper look alike old lady greeted me back with "listen, we're not in a rush, i'm going to say this again, we're not in a rush, we're not ready, come back and take our drink order, we don't want to be rushed." Smiling at her, I said "Okay" and walked away. I took care of greeting and serving four other tables with drinks before returning. I took down her heavily modified vodka & tonic with the tonic on the side and a lime twist, and the rest of the table's house drinks and put them in. I then waited about 40 minutes to put in their food order after crashing the entire kitchen last week by having to cancel their order for 40 minutes because one of these old ladies took that long to eat a house salad and didn't want her food served until her salad was finished. When their food was out, I did a check back on the table and everything was fine. The Cryptkeeper then looked at my nametag and remembered who I was from last week. She apologized for yelling at me several times about not being in a rush. Gee, thanks, I only heard it several times last week. Anyhow, their $10 on $50 was worth the hassle, and gave me a lot of time to talk to my other guests who left me $20 on their checks in that hour.

Later on in the night I had a guest order the $6.95 cheeseburger, and would only allow her children to order fountain drinks because they could get free refills.

I also had a guy and his girlfriend camp for two hours, sent 2 appetizers back because they got cold while they both took trips to the bathroom, and complained about various minor things. They also found ways to special modify the simplest of things. They left me $3 on $68.

For the most part, the shift wasn't so bad despite the few people who worked my nerves.

Just when I thought I had seen everything...

Every week I work several shifts on our outside patio. The patio has it's ups and downs, mostly ups considering there is minimal sidework, easy going and relaxed diners, and the fact that you can smoke at a table. Since our state passed the anti-smoking law, the patio has become the hot spot for campers and old ladies. Usually the outside crowd is pretty laid back, but lately it's just been a glorified trash bin.

Just when I thought I had seen everything, a table snaps their fingers at me and calls "mita!" Of course, our area is densely populated with Spanish speaking people, so I turned around and said "I'll be right with you" as I scribbled orders down for the table I was currently talking to. If this wasn't enough, they then played musical chairs for several minutes until getting the right seat and placement. I greeted them, took their drink order, rang in their orders correctly, and then went to the kitchen to make their sodas. On the way inside, one of the men at the table asked me to bring a ramekin of warm milk out. When I asked why, he showed me a tiny kitten curled up in a shirt on the table. I suggested he go down to the pet store around the complex to buy a bottle of kitten formula, but he insisted he knew what he was doing with the milk. Thinking of my tip and the price of their bill, I got him the milk.

When I returned to the table after the entrees were run, one of the guests mentioned that his rice didn't come with his meal, so I offered to just get him the side of rice. He shouts "I don't want these vegetables touching my steak!" I took his steak back to the kitchen to have it replated without the veggies. Out it went. When I got back to the table, Mr. I know how to be a good server though I'm a shitty guest complained that there was no silverware. I dropped down 5 rollups, then in his fit of rage, he managed to knock over two beverages on to his lap. What do they do? They get up from this table and go over to another table in my section, leaving a dirty table behind that I now have to clean up before I can be resat. These geniuses then complained that they didn't like the breaded shrimp, so I offered to bring out some grilled ones. They agreed, and then right after I rang them in, they cancelled the order. I figured at this point it wasn't worth upsetting my other guests over, so I just flat out ignored them until the check time came. The check turned out to be $52, in which they handed me a $100 bill. They asked for $45 in change. I thanked them for their business. I don't need their money.

On top of that incident, I also got sat with the same woman who fell asleep in a co-workers section last week. She ordered a salad with about 8 lines of special modifications, ate 3 large ramekins of balsamic glaze dressing, and then ordered a hot tea. She left me $3 on $10, so that was okay. I'd much rather deal with the sleepyhead lady than the table full of guys who only speak English when they want to complain.